A Hiatus, Explained

I know it seems like I've been absent for forever...which I have been. But, I have an excellent reason:

!!!!

That was in June. And now?

 I have the most perfect newborn: Baby J. I'll still be adding pictures and I'll be posting much more regularly now. Because how can I deprive the world of this?

Brightening Up the Day

The other day at Whole Foods, I bought a gorgeous bouquet of flowers...just because. Sometimes we need green and flowers in our homes, ya know?  The bouquet was full of stargazer lilies, which are horribly smelly (in a good way!). And my favorite.

Brunching

Earlier in June, we had TH's best friend from high school over for brunch.  The friend normally lives in D.C., but he was here for their 10 year high-school reunion.  TH and I had a wedding on Saturday night, so we had them over for brunch on Sunday.  I'm not SuperWoman (although I often proclaim to be), so Sunday morning I sent TH to the bakery to pick up some goodies. I just made eggs (scrambled, all in one pan. Because I am also not a short-order cook) and bacon (in the oven. Try it. You'll thank me). The simplest type of brunch, but the most delicious.

While the chocolate croissants and cinnamon rolls looked delicious, TH would only let me eat the fruity pastries. Because he doesn't like them. Because I'm married to a 5 year-old child.

Summer's Here!

If you know me, you know that I hate hot weather. Why I live in Texas, where it is routinely over 100 degrees for three months at a time, is beyond me. In fact, around June or so of every year, TH and I look at each other and ask "Why don't we live in Colorado, again?" It's terrible. I hate sweating, I hate the high A/C bill in the summer, I hate how I have to water my plants twice a day, etc etc etc.

But I love summer produce. And something about fresh tomatoes and going to a farmer's market to pick out the best locally-grown produce just makes me happy. There's nothing like a fresh tomato with a little salt and little olive oil. I eat that probably for probably a quarter of my meals during the summer. And don't get me started on watermelon.

I love these little cherry tomatoes because I can just cut them in half and drizzle salt on them. Or slice them and add Vidalia onion, garlic, and olive oil in a pan for a quick pasta sauce. It doesn't hurt that they're so darn adorable, as well.

Lawyer-Speak, Decoded

I realized today that lawyers have basically created a double-speak language that we use when we want to broadcast our feelings without actually *saying* what we feel. Often, lawyers use this language when dealing with judges or opposing counsel - someone with whom we have to use *very* precise language.

1) "With all due respect..." Anecdote: I was arguing in front of a judge the other day. The law was on my side - this was undisputed. The judge ultimately held against my client, based on a horribly erroneous interpretation of the law. In responding to this (and attempting to politely inform the judge that he was SO WRONG), I responded with "With all due respect, your honor" and proceeded to attempt to change his mind. No such luck - but "With all due respect" was my code for "Stop being such an idiot!"

2) "Honestly..." I don't use this one, but any time someone prefaces an explanation with "Honestly," the words immediately following that are not "honest."  If a party on the opposite side of a case starts his explanation with that word, I know to follow up and figure out what actually happened.

3) "Probably/More than likely/Not likely" These are a lawyer's answers to any questions posed by a client. The first thing they beat out of you in law school is the ability to answer yes-or-no questions.  Even if I have a unanimous Supreme Court opinion on the very question the client asks, I would be hard-pressed to say "Yes!" or "Nope!" It's just not in me anymore. (Unfortunately, this has translated to my everyday life and it drives TH crazy. I can't tell you how many times he's responded to me with "Can you please just answer my question?" No. No, TH. I can't just answer your question.)

4) "Mistakes in judgment were made." This is easy. It means the lawyer screwed up. (I have yet to use this one, thank God and knock on wood).

Same Planet, Different Worlds

And apologies for stealing that title from a Non-Sequitor comic strip that I remember.

But this phrase occurred to me when I was going to bed on Tuesday night. It was about 11 pm and I had just turned off the light, put my earplug in (TH stays up later than me and snores. They're a necessity), and was doing a final email check on my phone before I went to sleep. (The life of a lawyer - checking the phone is the first thing we do in the morning and the last thing we do at night). I noticed that I had a new text message.

A friend of mine, who is not married, had just texted me that she was heading to a strip club after going to a happy hour. I realized that me, in my nightgown and with my earplugs, and her in a cab heading to a strip club, pretty much summed up the differences in our lives.

And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Quickie Quotes

Watching the deodorant commercial with Bear Grylls (host of "Man Versus Wild"), TH asks: "Isn't that guy the host of one of those 'surviving the wilderness with some douchebag' shows?"

I wanted to correct him, but it seemed pretty apropo.